Get Away Jordan

Today makes one month since we buried my grandmother. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Yes, she’d been sick. Yes, I was tired of her suffering. Yes, I know she’s in a better place. I was prepared but I wasn’t ready. Watching her pass away will be forever embedded in my mind. The disbelief of what I witnessed. Watching but only a silent witness. Having to feel the chill come across her body because my spirit truly wanted to believe she had more days than the time that was left. How does goodbye always come so many moments too soon? Why is forever permanent? Where is home when the one it resided within is gone?

I’m wondering if Heaven can wait
Just a few…
Another minute of another hour of another day
Too many questions left unanswered
Hugs yet to be given
I can’t remember those instructions
Unwritten recipes
Something about boiling pennies in water
Crooked arms and bowling
Scrabble games waiting
I need Jesus on the mainline
Just. One. More. Time.
One call
One conversation
One hug
3 words
I love you
X’s 2
Don’t Go
Holding on to memories of you within my mind
No longer in the same place
Thoughts are all I have left
Trying to let go and let God
Neither seems to be working
It’s a sad day in Jerusalem
The church is weeping
No sleeping
No peace to be still
The storms of life are raging and I can’t find no place to go
I be Jacob, garments torn and covered in sackcloth
David on the threshing floor
Past a season and time to be born and to die
Eyes upon Jesus
Cheerful of face but full of sorrow in heart
Weeping endures for more than a night
Calling steadfast to HE that is within me
Needing an ever-present help
Seeking refuge
Oh Shirley, “I Remember Mama”
There was a leak in her building and her soul had to move


One thought on “Get Away Jordan

  1. Nykieria,

    I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot read your entire piece because it is too moving for me right now, my own broken heart not yet healed enough following the loss of my mother in 2013.

    But I will read it… time.

    Just know that you are in my thouhgts and prayers my dear.

    And I’ve sent you a private email.

    Peace and Blessings!

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